Wednesday, December 3, 2014

I'm back... I think

Since I am no longer working, I've had a lot of time on my hands.
*Please trust that I am not happy about this. I HATE not working, but it's a tough market and even though I'm sure I put in at least a minimum of 12 applications per day, I have yet to receive anything promising (this includes interviews)*
I've decided to join a Wiccan group in my area (it's not close, but it's not extremely far either).
I've been working on my mantras of prosperity and trying to reach out to the Goddess Lakshmi and the God Ganesh.
I've been logging in my BOS (book of shadows)
and now I'd like to go back to posting on my blogs.
Ultimately I have to rekindle a relationship with my creativity and innovation. This not working thing has really put a damper on me and my confidence. I don't think I've ever had this much trouble finding a job. But to be honest, I think it's just because my standards weren't really that high. It might even be that I had no standards before. But now that I have a little one to worry about and getting out of the shelter to consider I can't just take anything. However, even with that in mind, I'm at the point where I'd almost take anything. Just to have a little bit of change to buy diapers and pay bills. Even if I hate bouncing around from job to job, "anything" would hold me down until something better came to fruition. What I always find so frustrating is that I apply for these excellent jobs that I get so excited about and....... Exactly that............ waiting..... waiting....... waiting. I know that good jobs take time to get but I don't have time. I've been trying to cut corners by going onto Craigslist, but still the same thing....... waiting...... waiting...... waiting. It's been the same with the (very few) interviews that I've gone on. Which is astonishing because I've never been on an interview and not gotten the job. It started with Taboola and has been the same since. They fucked up my mojo. I like to think that I'm not getting these jobs or these interviews because there's something better, but that sentiment starts to feel less and less likely when these really awesome jobs keep passing me up. I'm trying to be positive and shit, but it's tough. Not much seems to be looking up. But alas, I have faith in Lakshmi and Ganesh and like L says "nothing happens before or after it's time".


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